Freedom to Choose
I’m sure we are all feeling the same way.
Schools back in session. Activities have commenced. Schedule has gone haywire. Your “to do” list replenishes itself daily.
As women who are running businesses while also keeping a household running we live in constant search of the illusive holy grail…work/life balance. We slip into comparison with other women, “I’d sure like to be where she’s at, she’s got it all together” or we entertain thoughts of judgement like “She’s just crazy!”.
I’m going to share something with you that took a huge weight of my shoulders and has kept me out of thoughts of comparison and judgement with other Mom’s…
I hold the power to define what work/life balance looks/feels like for me.
For our family, I look at it more as finding a harmony between work and life. They blend together to create my life, one doesn’t necessarily stop before the other begins. Over the past 9 years of BMD I have not always remembered this fact & honestly, it has been just recently that I have really come to terms with this thought. So how did I get there? I think it could be narrowed down to Two perspectives.(and they both just happen to be Danielle LaPorte Truthbombs-go figure!).
One…Respect your wishes.
I am a recovering overachiever. I am a person who runs a business that is based on service. If I don’t work I don’t get paid. The question was, how much work is right for me? Not what needed to be done or others wanted done… that list is never ending and often doesn’t have a single item on it for ourselves. I decided, for me, I needed to set boundaries with myself on work hours. In a world where productivity & being busy is the measure we all use this was the hardest step for me. Setting times where I am and am not available seemed almost counter intuitive to the type of business I have. In the end, keeping these hours has proved to be critical to my own self care and self worth. The moment I realized that I didn’t want to be tired and detached from my life was the tipping point to setting my life around what was of greatest importance. Setting dedicated work hours has afforded me the flexibility to be where I need to be, when I need to be.
Two…Go where the love is.
Sounds a little woo woo or touchy feely right? Well, let me show you my practical interpretation. I love my business and I love my family but over the past few years(and past 6 months in particular) I realized I was leaving myself out of that equation. Where was the time for me? I know that my personality is such that I can’t be a Mom, CEO or Wife 24 hours a day(and NO this is not blasphemy) without finding some time in there for myself. So I came up with a plan… Each week I would sit down and outline priorities for the following week. Not just a laundry list of “to-do’s” but a list that had work, family as well as mind/body/soul, chances for my creativity to come out and play. I also built the flexibility into the mix. What do I have the ambition to do right now? What am I in the headspace for at this moment? Then, and here is the woo woo, I listen to my gut. Yes I have items that need attention, every business has them, but there is a huge difference between urgent and priority and only you can define those for yourself.
I’ve always believed that living my life to work wasn’t my goal when I started BMD. I work every week to bring harmony into our family life, it’s not easy and often is a moving target but as a friend has often pointed out, we wouldn’t want it any other way.
Ultimately you hold the freedom to choose what is right for your life. I invite you to comment below and share with me any tips you have in designing your weeks? Let’s get a conversation going ladies!